My First Million
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F*ck the Spark Philosophy
A counter-intuitive approach to dating that rejects the requirement for immediate chemistry or 'sparks' and instead focuses on slow-burn connections that develop over time through compatibility and shared experiences.
How It Works
Works by debunking three myths: that attraction must be immediate to be real, that feeling sparks is always positive, and that initial chemistry guarantees relationship viability. Encourages giving good matches more time to develop.
Components
Recognize that only 11% of people experience love at first sight
Understand that some people are just 'sparky' and give that feeling to everyone
Give potentially good matches 2-3 dates to see if attraction can grow
Focus on compatibility factors like shared values, communication style, and life goals
Look for slow-burn indicators like increasing comfort and deepening conversation
When to Use
When you find yourself rejecting potentially good partners because you don't feel immediate butterflies, or when you keep getting attracted to charismatic people who turn out to be wrong for you long-term.
When Not to Use
When there's genuinely zero attraction or fundamental incompatibility, or when someone gives you genuinely bad vibes beyond just lacking immediate chemistry.
Anti-Patterns to Avoid
Example
“After a first date with someone kind and interesting but not immediately exciting, instead of writing them off, you go on a second date. By the third date, you find yourself genuinely excited to see them and realize the connection has grown into something meaningful.”